(shrines don't count unless they have lame cheesy titles)
Here it is, the world's only internet shrine to Lurtz, the most useless Uruk-hai!
Why Lurtz, you may ask. Well, why not? Lurtz is an Orc (OK, an Uruk-hai, if you want to get all technical on me) and I like Orcs. Besides, all the other characters from the Lord of the Rings movie got one - or more, in the case of those goddamn Hobbits. Come on, even that ever-so-cute little Hobbit girl who appeared for about 3 seconds got a web page! So I figured Lurtz at least deserved a measly li'l corner of this website. Even if he is the worst character ever.

When you really have nothing to say, fill your page with pictures. Yeah!

What to say about Lurtz? Um...hmm...he's an evil bad guy and he's real big.
All right, let's try that again.

Lurtz 4 Dummies!
The Obligatory Stuff
(Hey, if people didn't like being called dummies they wouldn't buy those silly books.)

Well, first off, for those who didn't actually read the novels, (for shame!) Lurtz wasn't in the books. Peter Jackson made up Lurtz. Why? The world may never know. So he's not really a canon character, and therefore doesn't count, but he rocks my socks anyway. Stupid villains are the best kind!

I have heard two theories for how Jackson came up with Lurtz's name:
1. It's a corruption of "Lugburz",
2. Named after some kid who used to steal PJ's lunch money.
I believe theory 2.

Baby Lurtz! Awww!

Here we see Arwen before her plastic surgery...

In the Fellowship of the Ring film, Lurtz was the firstborn and the strongest of the Uruk-hai, the soldier Orcs bred by Saruman. They were the most powerful of the Orcs, and unlike their forebears, they could withstand the light of the sun. (Jackson took a couple of artistic liberties with Lurtz's birth - Tolkien never mentioned Uruk-hai hatching from mucusy pods. But then again, he never said they didn't...and it's a really spiffy visual effect.)

Saruman, Pervy Orc-Fancier.

"Who's your Daddy?"

Basically, Lurtz is best known for not living very long. He's born, dirty old Saruman ogles him for a while (I still can't figure out why the hell he's bright blue in that scene), he says his line, the Uruk-hai are sent after the Fellowship, Lurtz kills Boromir, then Aragorn kills Lurtz. Way to go, Lurtz.

"I'll give you 'second breakfast', you fugly little bastards!"

Oh shit, I've run out of stupid captions.
Additional Photos (no, no, I'm not obsessed...don't be silly...)

Merchandise/Promos

Miscellaneous (odd pics, screenshots from the TTT video game, etc...)

Lurtz was played by Lawrence Makoare, who also plays Gothmog and the Witch King in Return of the King. I haven't been able to find much info on him, but there's a nice interview here.

Lawrence Makoare, the thinking woman's Orlando Bloom!

I don't really have an explanation or reason for liking Lurtz...I just do. I am fully aware of his pointlessness. He's oddly appealing to me somehow. What can I say? I'm weird. I like things that most people think suck. (I suppose I'm atypical among female LOTR fans...my favorite member of the Fellowship is Gandalf, I like the villains better than the Fellowship anyway, and I don't get why so many people absolutely despise Boromir. "He was mean to Frodo" isn't a valid reason. Actually, that's probably one of the reasons I like Boromir...)

Links 'n' Stuff
Lawrence Makoare's entry in the Internet Movie Database.
TORN's page for Lawrence Makoare.

What, you thought that shrine was lame? Jeez, you took it seriously or something? What the hell are you complaining for? The site is free! The most you lost was a couple precious minutes of your life. (Ha! I did it! I used the word "precious"! Now it's a real LOTR site!)